seen in northwest pdx today
my thoughts are all expressed. i’ve been talking so much it’s like i am out of words. exhausted the vocabulary and ready for a long quiet walk in the trees. poured out my story like whiskey from a shotglass. she said i have so much heavy on my heart and so much i am trying to right in my mind when it comes to the dna. and today i was a waterfall. a little red and i emptied the blue onto the table, scratching the ear of lucy and emptying the pain. she gave me permission to recreate my family in the faces of friends. the sisters and the brothers i have who don’t negotiate for hugs, who share the bliss unconditionally, who give me what i need in their truth and their reality, who show me who they are and hold me accountable and give me the easy sanctuary that family has always represented in my mind. for each of these people, old and new, i am grateful.
i spoke of feeling orphaned a day or two ago and i realized tonight that i am no longer lost. i am found. i am found in a way that gains clarity in each moment that i smile, each day that i find ease, each time i see myself reflected in the people who meander through my life. when you know who you are, where you were, and the possibility of where you may be going, it gives comfort to the mystery that is existence. today i saw sunshine in the air and laughed boisterously and felt great jeans slide over my hips. i visited old haunts and then traveled into new territory thanks to the encouragement of a friend.
maybe i’m just high on the fact that i felt damn great in these jeans that covered my hips and thighs just right. maybe i’m just happy after a great day with a friend. maybe i’m just chillin’ with my girl on a lazy evening with my feet up.
“There is light enough for those who wish to see,”wrote French philosopher Blaise Pascal,“and darkness enough for those of the opposite disposition.” I’m hoping you will align yourself with the first group in the coming week, Aquarius. More than ever before, what you choose to focus on will come rushing in to meet you, touch you, teach you, and prompt you to respond. Even if all the smart people you know seem to be drunk on the darkness, I encourage you to be a brave rebel who insists on equal time for the light.”